Author Archives: rachelauthorbarnard

Author Thursdays: Twenty-Five Words or Less

by in Author Thursdays
Author Thursdays: Twenty-Five Words or Less
Here is an activity for you: Write out a one sentence summary – in twenty-five words or less – telling what the book is about. It’s a “surefire way of finding out if your plot works or not; if you can’t do it, your plot is in trouble.” (87, Seuling). 
Here is my current work-in-progress:
Boy falls into well; becoming the feared beast and unleashing ancient evil. Girl is sacrificed to the beast but he loves her, saving them all.
I feel like it doesn’t do justice to the nuances of plot I have marked out but with such a word-limit, my twists and turns just didn’t fit. 
Your turn! Turn your current novel, short story, poem, etc into an enticing and telling Twenty-Five Words or Less Summary.
Don’t forget that Hemingway once wrote a story in just six words, “For sale: baby shoes, never used.”


“How to Write a Children’s Book and Get It Published [Paperback].” How to Write a Children’s Book and Get It Published: Barbara Seuling: 9780471676195: Amazon.com: Books. N.p., n.d. Web. 04 Apr. 20.13

Wildlife Wednesdays: Light-Skirt Caches

by in Geocaching, Wildlife Wednesdays
Wildlife Wednesdays: Light-Skirt Caches
Recently I was looking up blogs about geocaching to follow. I found a link to a website that talked about light skirt caches. They are quite popular but they can also be dangerous, I found out. Check out the blog:
His picture of an electrical burn victim was quite gruesome and most intriguing. Could that really happen during my happy geocaching adventures? Johnny Geo points out that light skirts are there to encase the housed electrical equipment and even though most of the time if you lift up the skirt the wires and electrical bits are contained, it doesn’t mean that it is safe.
I am a big geocaching advocate but this is a concern. Check out his blog for more in depth information and some grody and disturbing photos.

Toiling Tuesdays: Would you lie to get the job that isn’t your dream job?

by in Toiling Tuesdays and tagged
Toiling Tuesdays: Would you lie to get the job that isn’t your dream job?

I walk up and open the door. I hold it open for two ladies to exit and for one man to enter. Then I gather myself and walk in briskly. I want to make a good first impression, that I’m upbeat and ready for anything. I put on a smile and walk in to the dining area proudly, peeking around the corner to find someone who works there. It is almost 4PM and the dining area is deserted. A lady comes around the corner, “Can I help you?” She asks. “As a matter of fact, I saw that you were hiring a server and I wanted to apply.” I answer professionally and cheerfully, as if I have no where better to be but at this particular establishment  “Here is the lady you must speak to then.” The first lady beckons over to another lady. The second lady wastes no time, “Do you have experience with breakfast?” She scrutinizes me. I wish I had not just thrown a nice sweater over my black Beatles t-shirt. I feel that she can tell I cheated on my dress that day. “Well.” I pause. Crap. That was the moment to reassure her that I lived for breakfast. That I knew all about eggs and toast. But that’s not quite true. I never worked in a true breakfast environment. And if I was going to embellish or straight out lie about my prior experience I had already botched it with that pause. “I worked at a gracious retirement living center working many of the morning shifts, which were breakfast. I have also worked over three years in the food service industry.” I say swiftly. I have lost her. I can tell she has already said no in her mind. “This position requires experienced breakfast. We are very busy and we don’t have time to train. I’m sorry but we’re looking for someone with experience.” She basically shoos me out the door without even a chance to boast about how I can handle most anything, learn quick and fast, and am entirely up for the challenge. She is a no-nonsense gal and if only I had lied about my previous working experience I might have gotten the job but did I really want that job?

Foodie Fridays: the Involved Salad

by in Foodie Fridays
Foodie Fridays: the Involved Salad
Definition: The involved salad is composed of lettuce and one or more other elements. Also refer to the super involved salad composed of lettuce and many other elements. Also, simply the salad, of which there is only lettuce.
The Involved Salad Typical and Atypical Ingredients:
  • Mixed greens (the darker the better)
  • Tomatoes (Campari or Cherry are my favorites)
  • Peppers (I like to use yellow and orange ones for that fresh burst of flavor and color)
  • Carrots (Chopped is the best way to go believe it or not)
  • Avocado (See previous Foodie Friday post)
  • Hummus (Add the protein and the garlic zest)
  • Broccoli (Tear the florets up and toss them in)
  • Sun-dried tomatoes (Pack a powerful punch of flavor so be careful not to use that many)
  • Artichoke hearts (Break them up into small pieces)

Wildlife Wednesdays: The DNF

by in Geocaching, Wildlife Wednesdays
Wildlife Wednesdays: The DNF

 

 Sometimes time and space align to bring you a moment of irony. Some call it “perfect timing” while others refer to this phenomenon as hilarious.

I am a geocacher. It is one of the hobbies I pursue regularly and think about often. DNF’s or Did Not Find’s are nothing more than a challenge for the average geocacher. They present a learning opportunity, a chance to advance your craft, and a way to hone your finding skills. At times they can be aggravating, such as when the DNF signifies a cache that is actually missing, misplaced, or with wildly inaccurate coordinates. In all my geocache finds (200 now), only very few have I found when they were misplaced or far from the Ground Zero coordinates. Of those that I have found, I have looked for at least 50 more that I did not find. Sometimes I didn’t bother putting enough effort looking for these or the area was too muggle heavy and I planned to go back to look. Some of these, though, are truly missing. And here is the geocacher crux. I don’t want to assume that when I can’t find it, it doesn’t exist but I’m getting close to that point in my geocaching career that when I can’t find it, it truly is missing or buried in the forest without markings.

Here is the story of my favorite DNF:

At an undisclosed location in Washington State, two friends were hunting for caches in the area. She chose one and the hunt began. Behind a historic building at a sign was ground zero. It was fairly dark and the two friends whipped out their phone flashlights and swept up and down the sign and the surrounding area. After a thorough search, they looked up the hint, but still nothing. After twenty more minutes overturning every stone, they gave up. A week later she went back by herself and spent half an hour searching. She searched high and low and turned over every rock again. In the daylight, she was convinced that she was going to find it. She was fairly convinced, going over all the previous logs that it was on or very close to the sign but nothing. A week later they both went back, determined to find that sucker. He started perusing one side of the sign and she the other. Exasperated that it was difficult to find and obviously a creatively concealed cache, she said, “I’m convinced it’s on the sign but there’s nothing that comes off.” And with that she grabbed a chunk of wood in her hand to exaggerate her point and lo and behold it came off in her hand. They had finally found the DNF and could log it as a smiley.

 

Toiling Tuesdays: My Resume Binder

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Toiling Tuesdays: My Resume Binder

I walk around with a binder full of resumes. The binder also contains what I call my “cheat sheet” for job applications. This cheat sheet is full of any and all information a job application might call for. This way I can fill out all those empty spaces without checking for a phone number or an address in my phone. I can look prepared and professional, plus I can fill out one of those babies in a flash!

My resumes are organized into folders (the ones you get for filing), labeled by type. I’ve got my general resume in long (like CV) and short (for quickies), as an engineer (technician, PCB layout, assembler and general), Restaurant server, and as a writer. That way, if I’m talking to anyone that matters for job hiring, I’m prepared to give them something tangible they can use to look me up later.

My binder also comes with my business cards (general and for details regarding my book).

I also carry recommendations and my certification certificates (for food service).

In my mind I always carry interview responses, general knowledge about myself and my job history, and a sales spiel for my book (my product).

Nestled in my backpack in which I carry my binder full of resumes (which incidentally houses my laptop) I have one of my books for what I deem “an instant sell.”

I carry at least two pens in my binder and two pens in my backpack.

When that job comes calling, wherever I may be, I will be prepared.

Socializing Sundays: First Dates

by in Dating, Socializing Sundays

First dates can be awkward. First dates can be flirty and fun. To make the most out of this opportunity, it helps to be prepared and have some creative ideas. The best first dates are usually those that incorporate, 1. Conversation, 2. A shared activity, and 3. Putting yourself in the best light. 


1. Conversation: It is unwise to go to a noisy location on your first date. It is also not the greatest idea to do an activity in which you cannot talk to your date, unless you are into adventure dating (that is an entirely different ball of wax). Examples of dates that would inhibit talking during your date include going to the movies, a concert, a loud bar. This brings into question the entire point of a date, which is more than likely, to get to know the other person. 

2. A shared activity: You can bond over a shared activity, especially if it is something you are doing together. Also, try to choose something that you are moderately good at but not the most experienced professional at. You don’t want to make him/her feel inferior or like he/she has to teach you everything and you flounder away the entire time. Pick something that can challenge both of you and put you on an equal footing. For example, bowling. If you are not remotely on the same level then it is not as fun to play together, however if it is anyone’s game then for one you can see how the person reacts to competition, losing, winning, etc.  

3. Putting yourself in the best light: One time on a date I suggested meeting up for scrabble at a Starbucks. He agreed without hesitation. Come to find that during game play he cannot for the life of him add up the points on the tiles. Now, this isn’t rocket science, it’s simple arithmetic! Do not agree to do something that will show you in a poor light. You want to impress your date, not have them wonder how on earth you ever graduated from high school. 

Foodie Fridays: The Avocado

by in Foodie Fridays
Foodie Fridays: The Avocado

Avocados are quite versatile. They can be mashed up into sauces or sides, sliced and placed in salads or sushi, or cut in half and eaten with a little vinaigrette. I tend to use the avocado raw, plain, and unadorned.

There is an art to preparing an avocado. Step one is to de-sticker the sucker so that you can compost the skin. Step two is to cut around the entire fruit longways and pull apart the two halves. Then you can get fancy with your knife work and hit the large seed with the knife so that it sticks into the seed a bit and then twist it out of its place and throw it away. The last step is gutting out the good parts. I usually just use a fork or a spoon.

Avocados contain the good fats, proteins, vitamins, potassium, and more.

Avocado or guacamole makes a great topping for any burrito or in any salad!

Less well-known is the avocado smoothie! I wholeheartedly recommend trying one of these bad boys, just be careful of the added sugar.

True story: When I had my wisdom teeth removed, I ate/drank avocado smoothies every day as I recovered. They are thick and delicious.

One of my favorite stores of all time carries avocados in a five pack, which is great because I eat 1/2-1 avocado every day. However, if you buy five near-ripe avocados they have a tendency to ripen all of a sudden and nobody likes an overripe and browning avocado. One trick I use is to stick a near ripe and ready avocado (or two) into the fridge to slow down the ripening process. Or, if it is too late and you must gut the avocado you can store the thick goodness in a Tupperware in your fridge to enjoy in spurts. It will turn brown but still be uber delicious and ready to consume! If it starts to smell funky then it’s time to chuck it. Generally I would never keep a gutted avocado (unless it’s store bought with preservatives but why do that when you can buy ’em fresh?) longer than a week in the fridge.

Pair your avocado with some salmon and you’ve got a super serving of those omega-3 fatty acids!

Author Thursdays: "The Street Smart Writer" by Jenna Glatzer and Daniel Steven

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Author Thursdays: “The Street Smart Writer” by Jenna Glatzer and Daniel Steven

I am more than halfway through this book and I am rapt, reading through every tidbit of advice and laughing at all the personal stories the author describes. I would wholly recommend this book to any aspiring author with one caveat, it is now nine years old. That is an eternity for the evolving art of writing and publishing. There is a world of new information and new scams to be wary of. I would love to see an updated version or a sequel as it were. Here’s a link to the book on Amazon if you’re interested:

http://www.amazon.com/Street-Smart-Writer-Defense-Against/dp/0974934445

Or you can do what I did and check out a copy in your local library. My philosophy as a writer – and until I make the big bucks – is never to pay for any service intended to help my craft. I will pay to help other writers with their craft (i.e. purchasing and enjoying their self-published novel) but I will not fall prey to sharks and scams.

Jenna Glatzer even has her own blog, http://jennaglatzer.blogspot.com/

I’m definitely going to check out some of her other books.